Twenty-Something Blues

Last week I turned twenty-nine. This year's birthday crept up on me fast, and honestly I was not looking forward to being another year closer to shh, dare I say it ...thirty. Much like my birthdays over the past few years, my main focus has been on how quickly the fateful day is approaching, the ever present haunting of forehead wrinkles and crows feet appearing more frequently each time I look in the mirror, and to put it bluntly, the fact that my life is almost over.
So, when did thirty become the new fifty? I have had many intelligent (not to mention wrinkle-free) people tell me that your thirties are the best years of your life. Apparently in your thirties, the drama of your twenties is officially over, you are more comfortable and confident in yourself than you’ve ever been and miraculously you suddenly have money. As much as I think these praises of your thirties are meant to be reassuring, just a few weeks ago the mere thought of them sent me into a downward spiraling anxiety attack. All this is supposed to happen for me over the next year?! How? When? Why? For what reason...
There I was, sitting in my car with a few minutes to spare before entering my workplace, on the brink of hyperventilating, scrutinizing a tiny laugh line sprouting on the corner of my mouth, a small tear welling up along the edge of my left eye, when it suddenly hit me, I'm only turning twenty-nine!!
Instantaneously a whole new perspective had crept in alongside the doubts and fears of my mini quarter-life crisis. This was the beginning of the last year of my twenties, not the end of an era leading to my impending old age and wrinkledom. Twenty-seven and twenty-eight had, at the time, seemed like my path toward doom, but twenty-nine had unexpectedly taken on a whole new meaning.

My mission was clear. I had to start living my life like I did in my early twenties, when my mind was open to all sorts of new possibilities and it seemed like the entire world was at my doorstep for me to explore. I had to take on twenty-nine with a new found enthusiasm and zest for life, and for the next year eliminate the word thirty from my vocabulary. Once it dawned on me, I realized it was one of the best ideas I’ve ever had. I would set out to make the last year of my twenties one of the most memorable and exciting years of my life.

So, with that in mind, and a little prompting from my best friend, Pdxpectations was born. I’m getting back to my roots and my love of writing, and letting you all into my head even though it’s a little bit scary and overwhelming. I hope that anyone who reads these posts enjoys what I have to say, and gets a laugh out of my zany ideas. After all, you’re only twenty-nine once, so here I go.